Chapter Three - The mind at the heart of it

 

Chapter Three

The Mind at the Heart of It

Let’s step back and talk for a moment about the person who has discovered they have talent, who has found some joy and freedom expressing themselves through that talent, and is now innocently looking to learn more about where, how, and why they want to do more. Think of that contagious happiness when we see them in their most unfiltered, untethered bubble, free from  judgment, and you can tell they’re getting somewhere with it. If this person was a child, we would absolutely want to protect them at all costs and literally fight anyone who wants to squash their happiness and right to play. Roll up your sleeves; I’m right there with you. 

Is there any good reason why you can’t afford yourself this kind of protection? Forget for a moment all of the things that might complicate your daily grind or the things that feel undone. Think about this moment right now, when you are investing in the curiosity about who you are and what you can do. 

It’s sometimes a maddening thought that even when we see ourselves in a mirror, we don’t accurately see ourselves the way others see us. We love to say that we’re our own worst critics, always so because we strive for acceptance from somewhere. Where does that need come from? Does it come from our upbringing or everyone who doesn’t measure up to that level of love and support? Does it stem from a relationship or some other form of rejection? It’s different for everyone. And that’s okay, until we see ourselves and what we do in context to others. 

You will find that once everyone is out on the playing field, there’s a natural tendency to see everyone else as competition. Why are they successful? What did they figure out? Is there something they’re doing that I’m not? Context is a delicate thing to consider, for us to understand if we’re even in the same game, so it’s important that we don’t measure value over knowledge. 

In some ways, of course, competition is super healthy, but only if it’s done without envy. If you use the people around you to inspire your work ethic, your level of daring, even your curiosity to explore that undiscovered territory of your talents, that’s the absolute best situation you can be in. Many of the top artists out there with long careers didn’t do it alone. They came up with a collective group of like-minded people, even those who had different talents, disciplines, or interests. 

Even with the best intentions and a loyal circle of conspirators around you, the sense of competition mixed with over critical self-evaluation can be overwhelming. Nobody wants to feel a sense of being left behind, and you’ll get a lot of help with your self-doubt and focus on your flaws. Here’s the fascinating paradigm that we usually don’t see until we’ve taken some bruises and have essentially learned to not care; Your talent, your voice, your journey is yours alone and has a value unto itself that nobody really has the power to take away. You might face some harsh critics (mostly people who cannot do what you do, or haven’t tried), you might even keep poking at apathy where you want acceptance. At the very center, where your capability meets possibility, you are untouchable and there is absolutely no denying the spark, the thing you love doing and your ability to do it. In some ways, the hurdles you run up against, the critics and naysayers, that pack you’ve found yourself running with, are all a good test for how much you really want it and where you want to go. 

Turning this around to those people you might see as your competition, all of those people have their journeys as well. They’ve made sacrifices, had amazing strokes of great luck and terrible streaks of bad luck. They’ve been overlooked and pressured to succeed, criticized and praised, and have their own unique set of defining milestones to get to where you see them. The way they do things may not make any sense to you, and much of internet culture is built on an idea of “better than,” but the dues they’ve paid and the direction they’re going is just as undeniable as your journey is. In that respect, they’re not really competing with you, nor are you with them. Your paths may be similar at this point, but considering everyone’s starting place, you’re all on slowly merging lanes with totally different outcomes ahead. There are no seven golden tickets in play here. There’s a vast world and an unlimited supply of opportunities if you’ve allowed yourself to be flexible enough to really follow your heart. 

That is the trick, though, isn’t it? Now that we can assume an even playing field, who are we, and what do we uniquely bring to the table that can set us apart from the horde of individuals? It could be that you don’t want to mix in with the crowd and stay within your private niche, where you’ve created a safe place to create and take chances in. You may already know who you are in that specific context, and that’s a pretty amazing place to be, and a great place to create from. If you’re going to get out there, however, and see how far you can go, read on.